is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
