Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?