She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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