Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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