I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
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i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
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A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
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