It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila