I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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