If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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