Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
