he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
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I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
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They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
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