Texts From Last Night

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  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!

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  (857): Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?! http://tfl.nu/m6me
  Replies (15) Good night (542) Bad night (1234)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back

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  (617): but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back http://tfl.nu/ogq4
  Replies (30) Good night (942) Bad night (2272)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?

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  (443): sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this? http://tfl.nu/z2x3
  Replies (13) Good night (836) Bad night (3308)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.

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  (765): There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break. http://tfl.nu/iu19
  Replies (13) Good night (1241) Bad night (4014)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on

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  (803): I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on http://tfl.nu/5tgi
  Replies (43) Good night (9570) Bad night (1002)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same

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  (203): so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same http://tfl.nu/kiu0
  Replies (19) Good night (6054) Bad night (943)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.

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  (401): I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver. http://tfl.nu/132c
  Replies (21) Good night (6112) Bad night (1349)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  bloody. ill be home soon.

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  (215): so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know? (267): bloody. ill be home soon. http://tfl.nu/2ypq
  Replies (7) Good night (3718) Bad night (1011)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?

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  (412): Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something? http://tfl.nu/z60e
  Replies (2) Good night (2439) Bad night (754)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year

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  (704): 2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year http://tfl.nu/2ypx
  Replies (7) Good night (1855) Bad night (844)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?

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  (954): oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied? http://tfl.nu/xnft
  Replies (22) Good night (1869) Bad night (1751)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.

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  (205): I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick. http://tfl.nu/9o5a
  Replies (5) Good night (1660) Bad night (618)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.

  (1-229): View more from Georgia

  I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.

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  (229): I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier. (1-229): I feel like I got ass raped in the brain. http://tfl.nu/l1ue
  Replies (15) Good night (846) Bad night (545)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.

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  (775): Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity. http://tfl.nu/mwyr
  Replies (6) Good night (486) Bad night (226)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Damn, well, it could always be worse

  (1-423): View more from Tennessee

  For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad

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  (423): Damn, well, it could always be worse (1-423): For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad http://tfl.nu/5yq7
  Replies (0) Good night (338) Bad night (214)

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