I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Randomize
