So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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