Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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