do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
