i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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