I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
