Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(323): View more from California

You got in a fight last night?

(818): View more from California

Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.

(323): View more from California

Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(323): You got in a fight last night? (818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since. (323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you? http://tfl.nu/hf09

Replies (132) Good night (8804) Bad night (24370)
Favorite
(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(902): I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out. http://tfl.nu/3h1q

Replies (13) Good night (1127) Bad night (3314)
Favorite
(440): View more from Ohio

i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(440): i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends. http://tfl.nu/xfyh

Replies (12) Good night (931) Bad night (4176)
Favorite
(203): View more from Connecticut

We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(203): We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won. http://tfl.nu/1h1c

Replies (39) Good night (9388) Bad night (1109)
Favorite
(631): View more from New York

Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(631): Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend... http://tfl.nu/7zoq

Replies (5) Good night (5819) Bad night (863)
Favorite
(416): View more from Toronto

that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(416): that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle http://tfl.nu/ax2q

Replies (11) Good night (1487) Bad night (4939)
Favorite
(619): View more from California

Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(619): Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him.. http://tfl.nu/bqg4

Replies (13) Good night (3043) Bad night (896)
Favorite
(574): View more from Indiana

Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(574): Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance. http://tfl.nu/jrt8

Replies (6) Good night (636) Bad night (2300)
Favorite
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches. http://tfl.nu/i131

Replies (6) Good night (1470) Bad night (544)
Favorite
(315): View more from New York

Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(315): Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper... http://tfl.nu/s6hc

Replies (6) Good night (590) Bad night (1069)
Favorite
(813): View more from Florida

I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(813): I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me. http://tfl.nu/rba0

Replies (3) Good night (2380) Bad night (613)
Favorite
(253): View more from Washington

You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(253): You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded. http://tfl.nu/x9oy

Replies (2) Good night (1016) Bad night (553)
Favorite
(410): View more from Maryland

IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(410): IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS http://tfl.nu/c2np

Replies (10) Good night (1106) Bad night (603)
Favorite
(423): View more from Tennessee

There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(423): There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork. http://tfl.nu/8h9m

Replies (3) Good night (993) Bad night (389)
Favorite
(630): View more from Illinois

you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(630): you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way. http://tfl.nu/lvrh

Replies (1) Good night (566) Bad night (354)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard