How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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