3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
