We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Just pee around me
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
