My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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