...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
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