I should be sponsored by Trojan
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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