hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize