let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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