just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
