brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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