i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize