It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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