Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
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