I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I am spending my child support on dildos
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
