I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
