Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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