there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize