Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats