doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
