I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
