i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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