You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
