Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Randomize
