Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
