sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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