If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
