We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
