I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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