I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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