If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize