i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
