so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize