Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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